Being a girl in Nepal, the most important thing that I am opinionated about is gender equality. And being a girl myself, people usually mistake my want for equality as feminism. To be honest, I really don’t care as long as you hear me out or at least pretend to! I am a Nepali and I am more than proud to be born in such a beautiful and magnificent country. But having said that, I have a lot of things that I don’t understand. No, I don’t want to understand those things which create a division between man and a woman. I am not saying that a woman is greater than a man but even a man is not greater than a woman.

Being a girl, the most sickening thing that I have been facing while growing up in Nepal is how people so easily judge us, like we are some material whose value is being tagged. Why do people who don’t even know us have a judgment about us? I am what I am, I don’t always have to do right by everyone. I have my own opinions, perspectives, and way to approach things according to which I act. We have been taught to be bold and have opinions about things from the very beginning but when it comes to reality, no, a girl’s opinions don’t have weight at all. We are meant to speak yet when we speak, we are called arrogant.

Who is to tell me my father’s house is not mine because I am married? But if I had a brother it would still be his house although he is married? I mean does that even make sense? Why do we have a culture that makes a daughter an outsider while the son is forever own? Only if I had a chance to go back in time, I would go back and see what type of men made these rules and under what circumstances. It probably came from people who didn’t have a daughter or didn’t have a common sense. I am not criticizing people who believe in all these, it’s not your fault that you are following your culture here. But equally, you should be improving your culture if it is hurting your family or your own daughter.

Luckily for me, I have a family that supports me and believes me under any circumstances. It’s because of them that I am confident and not afraid to portray my opinions in front of anyone. You should treat your daughters in the same way that you treat your son. Show them that you mean it and you don’t  care what others say about them. Show them that you have full faith in them.

I am not trying to be disrespectful to my culture or anyone else who follows it. All I am saying is perhaps you don’t understand what the fuss is about, but I am a daughter and trust me when I say this, “it hurts!” There are already plenty of other reasons ready to hurt us with every opportunity they get, so please don’t be one.

 

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Kathmandu Tribune Staff

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